Last Updated: 4 June 2017
Note: This blog post is based on the personal experience of Avix_G. It is not intended to provide a neutral, unbiased point of view. Proceed at your own discretion.
Perks are those coloured squares found in the perks menu. They also seem to be abhorred by noobs, as they are never seen using them. In this blog post, I will discuss my opinions of the different perks and classes of perks.
Classes of Perks
None of these are locking perks, which is good, as you don't want to have Fireworks when you're equipped with a Minigun. Although individually they don't seem too impressive, using several can greatly improve your firepower. They're good in the late-game and end-game, but kinda meh in the early-game. Choose perks from here if you know the server is competent and will at least survive night 20.
I personally don't find these too useful, as they don't add a whole lot to your survivability. The one I had been using was Escape Artist, which, being a locking perk, is probably the most useful of them all. I find the offensive perks much more reliable and useful on a regular basis.
These are cool, but not really that useful. Sure, moving faster is great and all, but your gun should be able to keep the enemies at bay. Charmer and Elusive aren't that great, as who cares about who the enemies follow?
"For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil." - 1 Timothy 6:10 (The Bible)
Money is cool. It can be used to buy most of the abilities of other perks. However, in the end-game, there comes a point when everything that can be bought, has been bought, and money kinda becomes useless. Most new players will choose from this set, particularly Piggy Bank. Great in the early-game, not so much in the end-game.
Fully upgraded, this perk allows you to buy and sell any tool with no loss in value. While cool, it's not necessary if you're making smart purchases. Not recommended unless you're a researcher and want to test out every tool.
Now your armour can be alive too! It isn't a whole lot, but it can seriously boost the lifespan of your armour. You practically get a new suit every 3 minutes and 42 seconds if maxed. Probably tied for best defensive perk, along with Escape Artist.
Why have 1 life when you can have 4? Because if you don't have enough dakka, you'll just die 4 times in a row. If you're like me and tend to suffer from both poor situational awareness and an occasionally questionable internet service provider, this is for you. It is not for players who die every single night. Being one of the better ones in the defensive section and one which runs out eventually (extra lives are only per shop life), it is a locking perk.
Only useful for explosives, and in particular, the RPG-7. It's rather low priority, but quite useful if you end up being artillery often.
Garbage. Noobs look at it and think, "Up to $6 000 at the start of the game? Awesome!". Of all of the monetary perks, this one is probably the worst of the bunch, as it's a locking perk that only works once during a game. Not a shop life, a game. Shadow Hunter comes close though. An easy way to tell if a player is a noob is to see if they are using this perk.
Kinda useful, but has its limits. I used this once, and thought it was cool, until I realized that I can't throw cash at enemies to deal damage. In my opinion, the best of the monetary perks, as it is the most consistent.
Up to 24% more HP? Instead of dying in 1 second, you'll die in 1.24 seconds! What an improvement! But seriously, underpowered in my opinion.
Sometimes you die now, sometimes you die later! As with most other perks that involve RNG, I do not recommend this one. You cannot adjust your playstyle as you cannot depend on it.
100%? Ok... 50%? Meh. 37.5%? WHY IS THIS PIECE OF S*** IN THE PERK MENU?! Assuming your team is generous, it's better to just ask for a few thousand every night. Even piggy bank may be more useful than this, as I somehow doubt the ability of this perk to generate $6 000 before the zombies win.
33.3% faster reload speed is kinda lame in my opinion, but it's something. Heavy weapon users may find this useful.
Not particularly useful unless you're a chronic sprayer and prayer or a Minigun user. If it's the former case, I suggest you visit your local religious institution or corporation, as I cannot help you. The only gun that benefits from this would be the Minigun. I got it because someone told me to get it, but I don't see why.
It's the most basic offensive perk, and is usually a good choice unless you're using the RPG-7 or a melee weapon. Not really noticable but it helps. It's better than Juggernaut as you usually aren't being attacked by enemies all the time.
Perks are what keeps players coming, besides trying to beat that night they failed on. The right perks can be extremely helpful to the player, and by extension, the server. Bear in mind their limits though.
"A noob with perks is still a noob." - Avix_G
Whatever you do, don't be that noob who has no perks.